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Post by Messire Woland on Dec 18, 2002 2:16:05 GMT -5
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Post by Messire Woland on Dec 18, 2002 2:18:10 GMT -5
À åòî è åäèí âúïðîñ ñ îòãîâîð îò Îðàêóëà:
The Internet Oracle has pondered your question deeply. Your question was: > Wise Oracle most global in perspective,
>
> Europe is just as rich and white as America, where do they
> get off by acting like they're morally superior?
And in response, thus spake the Oracle:
} Well, let's lay it on the table and see what we find:
1. Predominant racial grouping?
USA: White
EUROPE: White
2. Level of affluence?
USA: Rich
EUROPE: Rich
3. Repository for spoiled, rich idiots with famous parents?
USA: The White House
EUROPE: Powerless, symbolic royal families
4. Prevailing public opinion on:
a. Global warming:
USA: Facts aren't facts if they mean I lose money.
EUROPE: It's bloody obvious!
b. Terrorism:
USA: AIIIIEEEEE! KILL! KILL! KILL! KILL ANYONE WHO WHIFFS OF ANYTHING SUSPICIOUS!
EUROPE: It's a problem. Let's solve it.
c. Gun control:
USA: You can't make your problems go away just by outlawing them.
EUROPE: It's bloody obvious!
d. Keeping abortation legal:
USA: Let's outlaw abortion, and then the problem will go away! Hurray!
EUROPE: It's bloody obvious!
e. The death penalty:
USA: Victim's families will find bloodlust -- I mean, peace, and titillation -- I mean, closure, through revenge -- I mean, justice.
EUROPE: Two wrongs don't make a right.
e. War with Iraq:
USA: Look at all these bright, shiny weapons we've got!
EUROPE: Shouldn't we have a reason, first? Or some evidence? Or something? Hello??
f. Food:
USA: Did somebody say McDonald's?
EUROPE: Let's have some traditional regional favorites made with fresh ingredients, and a fine wine.
} So there you have it, supplicant. The Europeans aren't morally superior to you at all. Just intellectually.
}
} You owe the Oracle a star-spangled dunce cap.
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